Hello Friends,
In today’s episode of Welcome to the Garden, I’m chatting with my dear friend Ade, who is also known as Maid4luv, about balancing instead of bypassing, a topic we both happen to be realizing new depths of right now.
For various reasons, Ade and I have both been in hermit mode for a long, LONG time, and being isolated and doing spiritual work has allowed us to ignore the reality of the physical world and the needs of our physical bodies. Thanks to reflections from the people we live with — for Ade, her niece, and for me, my mom — we’ve both been able to see that this bypassing of the physical is not only out of balance, it’s unhealthy as well.
Together, we traversed depths of our own, bringing pieces of our subconscious into the light, and coming to new understandings about our coping mechanisms, how they’ve hidden in our behaviors, manifested at different times, and kept us trapped in our own trauma. These are the patterns that were once useful to us, helping us survive what happened to us — and we all have some version of these, no matter what we’ve been through. But after the trauma, after we’ve survived and it’s time to return to life, these coping mechanisms can become unhelpful at best, and toxic at worst.
I expected to ask Ade about how she balances all the different aspects of her life with her ever-evolving spiritual work, because I’ve always deeply admired her ability to do so. She has her amazing YouTube channel where she does really in-depth and insightful tarot readings about love connections, and she brings these readings through with such deep compassion. And in the meantime, she’s working as a holistic therapist, psychic medium, teacher, student and psychic surgeon. She’s also a therapist and trainer under the International Practioners of Holistic Medicine, a certified spirit release therapist, a Reiki Master and Munay Ki practitioner. And, on top of all of that, she has a PhD in human and social services with a specialty in online mental health interventions.
Can you imagine a better expert on balance?
But as we talked, we instead ended up focusing on what we’re each discovering within, taking our ongoing healing to new depths, and grounding ourselves back into our bodies by making the everyday stuff of life — things like eating, drinking water, hygiene, exercise — our practice in balancing instead of bypassing.
And we’re facing our need to get out there and interact with other people, after our years of existing in isolation.
“I think the challenge for us now, especially those who have been in hermit mode for a long time, where you can really get lost in your head, is to practice being in your body and being present and not just for other people, but for yourself.” — Ade, aka Maid4luv
We talk about why boundaries are so important, for everyone, but especially if you have trauma, and how boundaries are an act of self love. And so, I want to include a gentle content warning about some of the topics we discuss, because we talk about the effects of physical and sexual trauma and assault, the ways trauma can make us feel as if our body is not our home, how that manifests in our discomfort with our bodies when doing everyday tasks such as bathing, and trauma in relationships that involves infidelity and miscarriage.
If any of these topics are triggering for you, practice boundaries and self love around this and give yourself whatever space you need. Perhaps this isn’t something you can hear right now, or maybe it’s something you need to listen to in short bits. Or maybe, it’s just what you need right now and, like it was for us, you’ll find yourself doing deep healing work as you listen. Pay attention to your body as you listen, because it will give you the cues to know how to proceed.
And so, friends, I’ll leave you with this quote from Ade, because it’s just so, so good:
“We have to take control of our childhood before it destroys us.” — Ade, aka Maid4luv
I hope you enjoy this conversation, and find it as healing to listen to as it was for us to speak out loud.
Sending wishes for a peaceful and harmonious season wherever you are in the world,
Jodie
p.s. Here are the links!
💕 Check out Ade’s website at: https://www.maid4luv.com/, where you can learn more about her work, book readings and healings, sign up for classes, purchase her beautiful oracle decks and find the perfect guided meditations to help with your own practice in balance! And while you’re there, be sure to sign up for her email list too so you can find out about any new offerings she has available.
❤️ And of course, visit her on YouTube at: https://www.youtube.com/@Maid4luv where she’s constantly uploading new, lovingly-created and compassionate tarot readings for anyone seeking guidance on a love connection.
🌱 I wrote a bit more about my own lessons in balance this month, and in particular the things I’m learning from Eclipse Season! You can read or listen to it here:
🐝 If you want to hear from me regularly, you can subscribe at: jodiefletcher.substack.com and you’ll receive each new episode of Welcome to the Garden, and each new issue of the companion newsletter, Notes from the Garden, right in your email inbox.
🦋 And if you’re interested in booking a reading with me or purchasing one of my books, you can find both those things on my website at www.thedevicconnection.com.
Thank you so much for listening, and I’m so glad you’re here!
💚 Did you know that on Substack you can comment on podcast episodes?! I’d love to hear if anything about my chat with Ade really resonated for you! Feel free to comment and let me know!
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